Re Legality: you could come get married in Canada, you know. Actually lots of gay people come to Canada now to get married even if it's not going to be recognized in their home country. Just sayin'. ~_^
Of course, my engagement with Tav is being a very long one too, with no date-setting in sight... but that's more about personal financial practicalities and him still not being ready to be out to his parents. *le sigh*
Don't think it hasn't come up. Heh. It's just there are worries about parental reaction and such. She has schooling still to get through and to mess with that right now... let's just say we totally understand where you're coming from on the Financial Considerations front.
*smile* Though I do have a friend who encouraging our moving to Massachusetts what with the okayness of the marriage there, but we'll have to see.
Totally understood -- see references to the situation with Tav's parents. (I don't talk to mine anymore.)
The way Tav and I see it, we can have commitment and stability and celebrate our relationship plenty without needing to get married, despite what society conditions us all to believe. The marriage thing is about granting or massively simplifying legal rights like income taxes, spousal benefits, property issues, hospital visitation rights, power of attorney, inheritance, etc.
As long as we don't have property to fuss with and benefits are covered for both of us, we can hope that no emergency or tragedy comes up where the others would be a factor -- and really, at our ages, it's a pretty minimal risk -- and you guys are even younger. (Tav and I are *gasp* almost thirty! Ohnoes!) So it makes sense to wait and enjoy what you have now without needing to be married to do so.
Not that I didn't go all mushy and squeeful and romantic when Tav and I did finally make the decision that when it became financially viable we would get married for practical reasons, thus making us engaged. See above about social conditioning. *^_^*
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(no subject)
Date: 2006-04-19 06:00 am (UTC)Of course, my engagement with Tav is being a very long one too, with no date-setting in sight... but that's more about personal financial practicalities and him still not being ready to be out to his parents. *le sigh*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-04-19 05:14 pm (UTC)*smile* Though I do have a friend who encouraging our moving to Massachusetts what with the okayness of the marriage there, but we'll have to see.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-04-19 06:00 pm (UTC)The way Tav and I see it, we can have commitment and stability and celebrate our relationship plenty without needing to get married, despite what society conditions us all to believe. The marriage thing is about granting or massively simplifying legal rights like income taxes, spousal benefits, property issues, hospital visitation rights, power of attorney, inheritance, etc.
As long as we don't have property to fuss with and benefits are covered for both of us, we can hope that no emergency or tragedy comes up where the others would be a factor -- and really, at our ages, it's a pretty minimal risk -- and you guys are even younger. (Tav and I are *gasp* almost thirty! Ohnoes!) So it makes sense to wait and enjoy what you have now without needing to be married to do so.
Not that I didn't go all mushy and squeeful and romantic when Tav and I did finally make the decision that when it became financially viable we would get married for practical reasons, thus making us engaged. See above about social conditioning. *^_^*